Mar 2, 2010

* Spare the rod and spoil the child?

Parents will always wonder if they are doing it right with their child.
Some say, I will never hit my kid no matter what, it's just brutal.
Some say, I don't care and carry on because they believe "sparing the rod and spoiling the child" is not the way.
Some kids on the other hand, do not even need to spanked, they have got characters that are simply prefect where else some don't.
What are our options?
If you have a child who tore down the house with his tantrum, how would you deal with it?
My son was once that sort, and call me horrid, but the answer I gave him to all his intolerable tantrums were from my WOODEN BAKING SPOON! I didn't need to spank him hard till he bruised.. NO! That is abuse!
There is a way to instill fear into kids like these!
There even came a time, when I would carry that spoon in my bag when we went out!
He was the sort that could even sleep on the public floor if he didn't get what he wanted when we were out and he didn't care to be seen as embarrassing, so I showed him in return that I wasn't embarrassed to take the spoon out in public as well!
After several months of this, he took a 360 turn and these days, the fear I had instilled in him, has become a character he decided to stick with.
He is now the most decent, well behaved 3 year old, who hates to cry and mess himself up in public or at home, listens when I reason out things with him, and he reasons with me as well, because the tantrum have gone away to allow communication.
May be what he went through initially could be called a phase, but my fear was, what if it wasn't? What if I assumed it was a phase and it turned out to be my biggest nightmare? That rotten tantrums becoming his nature? There are many kids who do not ever outgrow it. Many end up becoming rowdies who would raise their hands on their own parents and elders even teachers.
Most of all, to me, I feel to discipline a child is the work of the parent. Not anyone else.
There is no use in you making an aunt, or uncle, or grandparents to do that dirty job for you.
It is our own responsibility to make sure the right comes from us not someone else.
Spare the rod and spoil the child.. NOT FOR ME!

"Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die."
"Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him."
"Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying."

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